Lately I have been feeling more adventurous than usual. I am doing stuff that is out of my comfort zone, which is a good thing, but it doesn't always lead to good experiences.
My latest adventure was a date. Now I am sure that to most people a date is not an exciting new adventure. But I don't go on dates. I am not a very social person, so it is surprising to say that I did most of the talking on this date.
So this date: it started with dinner (and I met this guy online so this was our first in person meeting) and he was awkward. I think at one point he said he was shy or something, I don't even know. He didn't know what to say to me when I met him at the restaurant (he got there before me and already had a table). I am actually surprised at how much talking I did the whole night.
Back to dinner.
It was nice. The conversation kept going and there were only a few moments of awkward silences. So I do not have much to compare this to, but he started at me a lot. Just looking while we were eating or walking around after we left the restaurant. I thought it was strange and really it made me feel uncomfortable. This date stretched out for a good three hours.
I talked to a friend of mine before me and she made sure to tell me to never get into a car with a guy on the first date. Seems like common sense when it is said out loud, but I am a blindly trusting person. I never think the worst of people so honestly it wouldn't have crossed my mind that it was a bad idea until I was in the car with him. Luckily it did not come to that. She picked me up and that was when my date got to its peak of awkwardness.
We were standing outside the restaurant waiting for her to pick me up--and he was bummed that he was not going to get to take me home--I am so glad he didn't. While we were waiting he was staring at me, so much that he even commented that he kept staring at me. And I didn't really know what to say to that. Anyway, this whole time of waiting he was trying to get up the courage to kiss me. I knew it and I was avoiding it. Something I have noticed about myself lately is I can't stand still. I bounce around a lot (something else he commented on). And that probably made it more difficult to kiss me. Well when she arrived in the parking lot he finally did kiss me. He was aiming for the lips, but I told him no. I was just not comfortable with that. And that was the end of our date. Not terribly exciting.
Over all, I am glad that I went on this date. It may not have ended well relationship wise, but I learned a few things about myself. It took me until last night to realize that I am perfectly happy with where my life is at the moment. I do not want or need to be in a relationship. I want to focus on my goals and living my life. I am content.
And this date led to a wonderful night with a friend. Sometimes all you need is to get drinks and talk with your best friend.
No comments:
Post a Comment